A Very Important Question

Don's Golden Nuggets
3 min readSep 23, 2021

Written September 11, 2018

It’s important to ask oneself: Do I possess my beliefs? Or do my beliefs possess me?

I see a lot of life in paradoxes and contradictions. I see how everything contains its opposites: enantiodromia, yin-yang, pros/cons, however you want to call it. You could say I’m very analytical in my thinking.

But what if the way I’m looking at life is “wrong”? What if my beliefs are not the “best” way to live my life? What if what I believe as “absolutely true” isn’t the case? 🤔

There’s a film I once watched called “My Dinner With Andre”. It’s a fantastic and thought-provoking film about 2 old Theater friends, Wally and Andre, who reunite for dinner after 5 years. Wally remained in urban New York continuing as a playwright while Andre abruptly left Theater to travel the world in search of something more.

Throughout the film you hear about Andre’s vivid adventures abroad as well as Wally’s eventual skepticism with them. They share conflicting viewpoints:

📍Andre believes in seeking transcendence; Wally believes in a more pragmatic way of living.

📍Andre would say to climb Mount Everest for a greater sense of purpose; Wally would say that same purpose can also be found in the simplicity and details of one’s own backyard.

📍Andre would say he receives divine messages through patterns he sees; Wally would say they are coincidences.

📍Andre would share the benefits of a subjective, emotionally-driven view of life; Wally would share the benefits of an objective, intellectually-driven, scientific view of life.

Who’s right in this case? Do they both have valid points? What I absolutely LOVE about this film is while they share many things they disagree on, they also are able to find COMMON GROUND within each other’s beliefs. They understand and respect each other’s viewpoints and why they believe them to be so. In the end, they BOTH are able to learn from each other. No pitchforks. No name-calling. No eternal righteousness. Just 2 people having a conversation.

And this brings me back to the original point of this post: We all have beliefs. But do we understand why we have them? In other words: Are we in control of what we believe…or do the beliefs themselves control us? Do we impose our beliefs onto other people because we selfishly want others to follow them too? Or do we voluntarily share them without the expectation of agreement? 🤔

One solution I want to provide to you in order to figure that out is to ask yourself: “What do I believe? And is it possible from another perspective my beliefs could be ‘wrong’?” Just like Wally and Andre, both were very open to this possibility. Otherwise they wouldn’t have been willing to communicate with each other at all. And I believe that’s something all of us need to embrace more in our lives to further work with each other. 👥

And I know some of you may be thinking: “This whole post you’re also sharing your own beliefs! Challenge your own!” I will assure you I have. I can see how my own beliefs have both pros and cons to them, and I still choose to hold onto them. They are currently what’s serving me in my life. I’m not saying you have to agree with me, nor would I say you have to believe it. It’s another point of view you’re welcome to agree with…or not. :) #TranscendLabels

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